


The Virgin Suicides

by freddiebenson



Category: iCarly
Genre: Angst, Drama
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2009-12-20
Updated: 2009-12-21
Packaged: 2013-09-30 05:12:03
Rating: T
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,481
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/s/5595562/1/
Author URL: http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1641930/freddiebenson
Summary: It was June 3, eighty-one degrees out, under sunny skies. Based on the book and movie.





	1. Chapter 1

I am a compulsive liar.

I own iCarly and The Virgin Suicides! MWAHAHAHAHA!

Okay, here's the chiz. The characters are like that Wendy is Cecilia, Sam is Lux, Melanie is Bonnie, Carly is Mary, Shelby is Therese, and Freddie is Trip.

* * *

The last 5 of the Puckett sisters to make their demise was Carly, by slitting her wrists, the three paramedics arrived at the house.

Wendy had gone first, by drinking cleaning supplies, while she was supposed to be doing her AP Calculus homework, and when the paramedics found her lying on the kitchen counter, her deep green eyes slowly losing their usual sparkle, they were so frightened by her tranquility that they all stood, motionless. But then Mrs. Puckett ran in, yelling, and the reality of the room came back: a drunken bottle of Clorox Cleaner lying on the marble floor. The paramedics lifted Wendy of the counter and thumped her, and the the thumping worked, for some of the liquid came pouring out of her mouth. Wendy's eyes blinked slightly, she sputtered and coughed, and then closed her eyes sleepily.

This was in June, fish-fly season, where our town (Grosse Point, Michigan), is covered with the annoying pests called fish-flies. Mrs. Harlinsonchester, who lived down the street, saw Wendy the day before her suicide attempt, staring at a Volkswagen Bug that was covered in fish flies. "You better get a broom, dear," said Mrs. Harrison, but Wendy replied blankly, "Fish flies live only for a day. They don't even get to eat." And then she stuck her hand in and printed her initials: _W.P._

We've tried to arrange photos in correct order, but through so many years has made it difficult. A few are fuzzy, but luckily revealing. Photo #1 shows the Puckett household shortly before Wendy's suicide attempt. Ms. Clare Dartmouth, the Puckett real-estate agent had taken. As the photograph shows, the slate roof hadn't begun to shed its shingles, and the patio was still visible beneath slightly overgrown bushes and trees. A comfy surburbia home. The upper-left second story window contains a blur that Mr. Puckett identified as Carly Puckett. "She used to tease her hair because she thought it was too thin.", he said. In the snapshot her head appears to be on fire, but it was only a trick of the light, for she was actually blow-drying her hair.

It was June 3, eighty-one degrees out, under sunny skies.

* * *

When the paramedics were satisfied that they had thumped most of the poison out of her, they put Wendy on a stretcher and carried her out of the house to the EMS truck. Mrs. Puckett burst out onto the porch, holding onto Wendy's flannel pajamas, and let out a long wail. Under the tall trees, the two paramedics holding onto the stretcher, the mother waving and wailing, and the drugged virgin, who almost died from drinking cleaning supplies.

Mrs. Puckett rode in the EMS truck, but Mr. Puckett rode in his Thunderbird. Two of the Puckett daughters were away from home, Shelby at a science gathering in Chicago, and Melanie at music camp, trying to learn the saxophone. Carly and Sam, upon hearing the siren, ran home from voice lessons at Ms. Benson's house across the street. Running into the large kitchen, they had the same shock as their parents, looking upon Wendy, passed out, a cleaning bottle on the floor, empty.

Outside, Carly and Sam clutched a tree branch, watching the EMS truck and their father's Thunderbird drive off. The Puckett's old elm tree, also visible in Photo #1, had on it fungus from the Dutch elm beetles.

The paramedics took Wendy to Bennett Rail Hospital on Cherrywood and Gostil. In the emergency room Wendy watched the successful attempt to save her life strangely. Her green eyes didn't flicker at all. Dr. Miller declared her danger-free and said, "What are you doing here? You're not old enough to know how bad life gets."

Wendy rolled her eyes and said, "Of course doctor. You've never been a thirteen-year-old girl."

* * *

The Puckett sisters where thirteen (Wendy), and fourteen (Sam), and fifteen (Melanie), and sixteen (Carly), and seventeen (Shelby). They were tall, covered in denim and tube tops, with round, soft cheeks.

No one ever understood how Mr. and Mrs. Puckett had produced such pretty children. Mr. Puckett taught high-school biology. He was thin, boyish, and had gray hair. He had a soprano voice, and Gibby Larson told us how Mr. Puckett had cried when Sam was later rushed to Bennett Rail during her own suicide attempt.

Mrs. Puckett was too thin, had straight blonde-gray hair, and cat-eye glasses. We saw her rarely, in the morning, dressed, although the sun hadn't come up, to get the milk. And on Sundays, when the family drove to St. David's Catholic Church on the lake. On these mornings she resumed a queenly iciness. Holding her good purse, she checked each daughter for signs of makeup before they could get into the car, and it was usual for her to send Sam back inside to put on a less revealing top. It was funny to watch, the two parents with no color, and the five glittering daughters sparkling in the sun.

Only one boy was ever allowed in the house. Shane Sissen had helped Mr. Puckett set up his classroom, and in return Mr. Puckett invited him for dinner. He told us the girls had kicked him under the table in every direction. They gazed at him with their green eyes, and smiled, showing him their crowded teeth. Melanie was the only Puckett sister who didn't kick him, she just said grace and ate her food, lost in the piety of a fifteen-year-old girl. After the meal Shane asked to go to the bathroom, and because Shelby and Carly were in the downstairs one giggling, he had to use the girls', upstairs.

He told us stories of bedrooms filled with underwear, stuffed animals lying about, a crucifix draped with a pink laced bra, of canopied beds. In the bathroom, Shane found Carly Puckett's secret stash of makeup: tubes of strawberry pink lipstick, blush and green eyeshadow. We didn't even know whose makeup it was until we saw Carly with a shiny pink mouth two weeks later.

He talked about deodorants and perfumes and pads for rubbing away dead skin, but most enchanting of all, was that Shane had found one Tampax, still fresh from the insides of one of the Puckett sisters, and that he had counted ten boxes of Tampax in the cupboard. It was then that Sam knocked on the door, asking him if he died in there, then she laughed and pushed past him and said, "Do you mind? It's private." And then Shane Sissen rushed downstairs, and after thanking Mr. and Mrs. Puckett, hurried off to tell us that Sam Puckett was bleeding between the legs, while the fish flies made the air dirty and streetlamps turned on.

* * *

When Jonah Baldino heard Shane Sissen's tale, he said that he would get into the Puckett's house and find even more incredible things than Shane. "I'm going to watch them taking their showers." He said, bravely. Already, and the age of fourteen, Jonah had the gangster gut and the face of his father, Toby "The Whale" Baldino. He moved slowly and we were scared of him. He had circles under his eyes, mammoth hips and shiny black shoes. He would sneak into forbidden places. In sixth grade, when the girls went to the auditorium to see a movie, Jonah was the one who snuck in. Later, he came to us and said, "I saw the movie. It said the when girls are about twelve or so – their tits bleed."

So one day, Jonah Baldino wandered into the Puckett's sewer grate. He approached the door to the kitchen. He heard gurgling, coughing, gasping, and then finally a thump. And then Jonah told how that he stepped into the kitchen, and saw Wendy passed out on the kitchen counter, with a Clorox Cleaner lying, empty, on the ground.

* * *

Thanks for reading! Review! Chapter 2 coming soon!


	2. Chapter 2

I am a compulsive liar.

I own iCarly and The Virgin Suicides! MWAHAHAHAHA!

Okay, here's the chiz. The characters are like that Wendy is Cecilia, Sam is Lux, Melanie is Bonnie, Carly is Mary, Shelby is Therese, and Freddie is Trip.

* * *

The paramedics found a laminated picture of the Virgin Mary in Wendy's lap during the crisis. Only at the hospital did the paramedic give Mr. and Mrs. Puckett the laminated picture.

Mr. Puckett shook his head and said, "We baptized her, we confirmed her, and she still believes this shit." Mrs. Puckett crumpled the photo in her hand (it survived: we have a photocopy.)

Our local newspaper neglected to run an article about Wendy's suicide attempt.

After they returned home, Mr. and Mrs. Puckett shut themselves and the girls in the house. Only when brought up by Mrs. Harlinsonchester did Mrs. Puckett refer to 'Wendy's accident', acting as if Wendy had thought she wasn't drinking Clorox Cleaner, but Jonah Baldino, already bored, was sure she knew what she was drinking.

Mrs. Hofert found it odd that the cleaning bottle was lying on the floor. "If you were drinking it on the counter," she said, "wouldn't you put it on the counter beside you?" This raised the question whether Wendy had drunken the bottle on the counter, proceeding to it falling off, or if she drank it on the ground.

Jonah Baldino had no doubts. "She drank it on the ground. Then got on the counter. She's crazy, man. Crazy."

Wendy was kept under observation for a week. The hospital records showed that the liquid had damaged some of her insides, resulting to her getting her stomach pumped.

She came back wearing the wedding dress that she always wore. Mrs. Rivera, who's sister was a nurse at Bennett Rail, said that Wendy refused to put on a simple hospital gown. Dr. MacPherson, the staff psychiatrist, thought it was best to humor her. She returned home during a thunderstorm. We were at Gibby Larson's house, when the first clap of thunder hit. Mrs. Puckett's station wagon rolled into their driveway. We watched Mrs. Puckett push open the car door, and open the the rear door. Rain fell. At last Wendy's red head came into view. Mrs. Puckett took hold of her elbow, and they walked toward the house.

In the following days we saw Wendy a lot. She would sit on the front steps, picking red berries off the bushes and eating them. She always wore the wedding dress and her bare feet were always dirty. In the afternoons, when the sun lit the houses, she would watch ants in sidewalk cracks or gaze up at the clouds. One of her sisters was always there with her. Shelby would bring science books onto the front steps, and look up whenever Wendy went to the edge of the yard. Sam spread out beach towels and suntanned while Wendy scratched designs on her leg with a stick.

Everyone had a theory to why Wendy tried to kill herself. Mrs. Waldorf said the parents were to blame. "That girl didn't want to kill herself. She just wanted out of that house," she said. Mrs. Harlinsonchester added, "She wanted out of that decorating scheme."

On the day Wendy returned home from the hospital, those two women brought over a Bundt cake in sympathy. We found Mrs. Waldorf much aged and hugely fat. "As soon as Annie and I brought over the Bundt cake, she told the girls to go upstairs and put the Bundt cake in the fridge right in front of us." Mrs. Harlinsonchester remembered it differently. "Truth is, Felicity's been potted for years. What really happened was that Mrs. Puckett thanked us quite happily. I began to wonder whether Wendy really did accidentally drink Clorox Cleaner."

The most popular theory to blame at the time was Jake Crandall. Jake was the immigrant boy who was staying with relatives until his family got settled in Switzerland. He was the first boy in our neighborhood to wear sunglasses, and within a week he had already fallen in love. He hadn't fallen in love with Wendy, but Riley Lyons, a pretty girl who lived in an ivy covered mansion on the lake. She didn't notice Jake peering through the fence while she played badminton, or as she sipped lemonade on a pool-side recliner. When Riley Lyons left for vacation in England, Jake was stricken. And to prove his love, he jumped off his relative's second-story window.

We watched him. We watched Wendy Puckett watching from her front yard.

He didn't hurt himself. After proving his love, some say Wendy Puckett developed her own. Duffy Shay, who knew Wendy in school, said that instead of studying for exams, she would look up "Switzerland" in the encyclopedia.

The supporters of this theory pointed to one fact: One week before Wendy's suicide attempt, Jake left for Switzerland.

The psychiatrist's report takes up most of the hospital record. After talking with Wendy, Dr. MacPherson diagnosed that Wendy's suicide attempt was an act of aggression. To each of the three different ink blots, she responded "A printer," "prison bars," and "the earth after an atomic bomb." Dr. MacPherson wrote, "I do not think the patient meant to end her life. Her act was a cry for help." He met with Mr. and Mrs. Puckett to loosen their strict rules.

From that time on, the Puckett house began to change. Almost every day, and even when she wasn't keeping an eye on Wendy, Sam would suntan in her orange bikini, causing the knife-sharpener to give her a ten-minute demonstration. The front door was always open, since someone was always running in or out. We saw the girls dancing in their living room, and when right before they pulled the shade down, we saw Carly Puckett in the back near the bookshelf, with bell-bottomed blue jeans with a heart embroidered on the seat.

For Mr. Puckett, everywhere he looked he found hairpins and fuzzy combs. Wendy had just gotten her period, on the same day as the other girls. He longed for the presence of a few boys.

And that was why, a month after Wendy had come home from the hospital, he persuaded his wife to let the girls throw the first and only party of their short lives.

* * *

Chapter 3 coming soon! Review!


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